Confidence could take a lifetime to build. Selna Kim struggled in finding his confidence since childhood, facing various traumatizing experiences in his journey. Still, he braved through his adversities and came out stronger.
Selna Kim was born Connor McCanless to an “above average” lifestyle. But his life took a 180-degree turn when his parents got divorced. From there, Selna was taken to several shelters, experienced bullying in school because of his family’s situation, and became unsure about his financial future as they faced bankruptcy.
The changes came rapidly in his life. Selna Kim saw how the divorce process drained not only his parents but also his energy. He sought refuge among his peers as he entered high school, but contrary to his hopes, Selna was also targeted by bullies. His self-confidence dwindled even more as he failed to create romantic relationships. “There were those who had it with women, then there were those who didn’t,” shared Selna. “I was one of the ones who didn’t.”
In college, Selna aimed to change his narrative and boost his social life. It was then that he discovered the club promoting industry, a “shady organization that lies behind the scenes of the world’s biggest nightclubs where men, who are chosen, go to transform themselves from losers and rejects to undoubtedly irresistible with the opposite sex.”
The experience was game-changing for Selna Kim. He entered the industry with little knowledge of what he was getting himself into. “At first it was like a dream,” shared Selna. He got acquainted with the top-tier people in the industry, learning the ropes and reinventing himself to fit in his newfound world. To echo Selna’s words, the club promoting industry was “one that laid in the shadows, pulling the strings behind the success of the Midwest’s most famous clubs.”
Exposed to models, private jets, raves, beach parties, and many more experiences brought out a different side from Selna Kim. Soon enough, he felt that he was losing his purpose and the main reason why he wanted to socialize. So Selna decided to leave the industry before he completely lost himself.
On a mission to share his experiences with others, Selna Kim wrote his debut novel Waking The Core of Man, hitting the top 200 dating books on Amazon. The novel exposes the life of club promoting and revolves around the author’s experiences in attraction, romance, and dating psychology.
Contrary to his past life, Selna Kim is now one of the most trusted relationship coaches across the country. He has worked with professional athletes, former American Ninja Warrior competitors, millionaires, and more. Learning from some of the world’s greatest club promoters that helped him boost his love life, Selna shares his learnings with his clients to strengthen their social relationships.
Additionally, Selna Kim aims to lessen the divorce rates in the country through his book and platforms, believing that no one should ever go through the same challenges he had to go through as a child of divorce. “I’ve been through the rejections, and I’ve coached thousands of men how to improve their confidence, attract, date, and meet their dream woman and have a successful relationship with her,” said Selna. “If I can help someone gain quickly what I struggled for years to obtain, the smile on their face from succeeding is what inspires me,” he added.
Opinions expressed by NY Weekly contributors are their own.